Sometimes you just need to write something. I wish I could write quickly in a way that could be read but I haven’t practiced that enough to do so. This has been a great week. I have been in Colorado for a week now and I have accomplished 1 of the 3 things I came to accomplish. There has been some very frustrating times and some very hopeful times. Ups and downs. Relaxing and working.
Each of the three things that I am trying to accomplish, in themselves are hard enough. Finding a new car that meets the needs of the family, fits in the budget and is available isn’t usually a single days task. Finding a job that will meet the needs of the family is hard enough, and when it is in another state, employers aren’t willing to look at you because they don’t want to pay for moving. Finding a new place to live in an unfamiliar area with unknowns such as where you will work or go to church or … you name it. Trying to accomplish all three on a short time frame is almost impossible. At least it feels impossible most of the time.
I came out here with hopes and a plan. I need a car to get around so I could look at houses and go to job interviews as needed. I need a job so that I can apply for a rental application. I need a home to show that I am living here in order to get a job. So, now I sit here, writing because I need to. I have a car. I have it registered here in Colorado. I have had an interview and I have another job lined up that doesn’t pay too well, but it is a job in case everything else falls through. I have submitted on rental application. I have tried to submit another but when I clicked on submit after filling everything in, it cleared everything except my name.
I had planned on leaving today in my new-to-us car with a rental contract in hand and a start date for a job. My plans…
The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.
– Proverbs 16:9
The plans of the heart belong to man, but the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.
– Proverbs 16:1
Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand.
– Proverbs 19:21
I had planned on being here a week or less. I had planned on things my way. When I focus on how my way is not working out, I get frustrated. When I change my thinking, and I pause my plans and trust in the LORD, then I know that things will work out. I know that His will will come through. I know that I can be confident in what He has called us to do and where He has called us to go. I am sure of those things. I know He has called us here to do something for Him. And He may not reveal exactly what that is until we get here… or months later. Or He may reveal it today or tomorrow.
I know He will reveal what we are here for, and I also know that if I am too focused on my plans, on my view, on my desires, on me anything… then I will not be able to see the revealing. It may be right in front of me and I won’t be able to perceive it. I will be blind to it. The Word tells us that we can do no thing without Jesus. No matter what we want to do, no matter if what we want to do is loving and caring and serving, we can’t do it without Jesus. Me might be able to go through the actions. We might even look like we accomplish something. We could physically build a house, but without Jesus, we aren’t making a home. Without Him, we can do no thing. With Him we can do all things. Jesus knows when we do things in ourselves and when we do things with Him. He even tells how in the end, some will come before Him having done some miraculous things and Jesus will tell them to depart because He doesn’t know them.
JESUS! The Word that brought all things into being. The One that created you and me. The One who holds all things together, the glue that binds everything together. This Jesus will tell someone who has done “good” works that He never knew them. He created them. How does He not know them?
It is in that knowing and because of that knowing that we are able to do everything. It isn’t just knowing someone by name. It isn’t even knowing where they work or what they like. It is a knowing you get only after laboring closely with them, battling through things, struggling together. Jesus asks us to do just that with him. Cast aside all your worries and doubts and fears and burdens and yoke up to me. Come labor with me. Come do work right next to me. I will show you the ropes. I will guide you in the way. I will teach you. And in the showing, the guiding and teaching, I will get to know you and you will get to know me.
This is what I need to remember as I am trying to accomplish my impossible goals. I must remember that they are my goals and as long as they are my goals, they are impossible. When I trust in Jesus and let His goals become my goals, He will make the way that I need to go. So that is going to be my focus for the rest of today. Tomorrow, is a new day and I will need to repent again of planning my day and thank God for His new mercies.